I’m about to test the strengths I’ve learned these last few weeks/months/years. I’ve planned a great adventure with my daughter which is totally out of my comfort zone. One that will include a Greyhound bus full of strangers, bad food and poor sleep. And then…
Destination: West Edmonton Mall
We will be shopping pretty much non-stop for 3 days then head home again. Well, the girl will be shopping with her money, I will be the one behind her carrying her many purchases and stressing over how to save a nickel (could we have popcorn for supper? I really don’t want those shoes. Yes I do. No I don’t.).
Does this trip fill me with anxiety? Oh yes, you bet it does. As a matter of fact today I had to drive to the airport where the bus depot is to purchase tickets and I felt so much panic as soon as I couldn’t see downtown anymore. Will I get lost? Will my bank card not work? Maybe I don’t have any money. Will my heart decide to stop beating? Will there be an accident while I’m driving my son’s van? Watch out for that old lady!!!!
Remember, this was just on the way to the bus station.
The original plan was for me to rent a car to get to Edmonton. This wouldn’t work out because I don’t have a credit card and also because I would have to sell my body 541,000 times just to get the $1,000 I would need. So Greyhound it is. I’m relieved I’m not driving the 15 hour trip. I would really be scared of getting lost among other things too many to list here. I’ve watched way too many movies where a car breaks down and weird-looking strangers make sure the passengers are never seen again. The mom always gets killed first.
So once I conquer the bus and the inevitable motion sickness I’m prone to, we hit the hotel and then the mall.
This is bigger than anything in my city. There aren’t just stores; there are amusement parks and restaurants and lots and lots of people. Lots of them.
I want to do this though because this is the last year my last child is a child. Next summer she will be an adult and making her own trips with her friends. This way I get her all to myself for a few days with no computer in my face. I’m really looking forward to it in spite of the gnawing in my stomach. After all, I made it out of the bus station with a few wrong turns on the way back but made it home, unscathed, just the same.
I take heart in these small steps as they are leaps and bounds to what I could do 5 or 6 or 7 years ago.
Like the mall.