Oh I have been a bad girl, missing at least 3 posts I had committed to writing. Things are so busy with summer and all. I find myself getting out of the apartment just about everyday now except maybe for most weekends.
Summer is always special. I’ve written about it before and now you can read it again: The smells (on my skin, in the air, my granddaughters’ hair), the beach when I can get there (which smells totally different by the way), walking and walking even though my knees are older than dirt and so are my hips but I still walk when I can.
I just came back from 5 days at the beach with my daughter and my sister’s family. I also was able to bring out my oldest granddaughter for the weekend. It was “Gamma Gamma” and some new words and lots of new dance steps as well as our old favourites. Even the nephews got into The Wiggles! Our little gal had lots of fun. I miss her now.
I also met a guy about a month ago. Things are really good but I won’t jinx anything. We will just see how it goes. 🙂
It’s been great to feel the freedom from the isolation I had for the last few years. This getting out everyday sure opened my eyes to my city. Buses are still the fun part of the day with screaming babies, drunks who want to smell my hair and sometimes meeting up with old friends for those brief moments until whoever’s stop comes first.
I’ve been handling the death of my dad by keeping very busy. It’s been kind of strange helping my sister do inventory on his estate and seeing some things for the first time and yet see the things he used every day too. I love how he and my mom are now both in my dreams at night.
I still smoke in my dreams every night too. Crazy.
One thing I am happy to say is we found my missing sister! Alive and as well as she can possibly be and in touch with another family member. Such a relief when I found out. I was in tears knowing she still walked this earth even though her demons are still chasing her. I don’t think I will ever see her again as it would be too difficult for her but having some contact through another trusted person makes it okay.
All that weight I lost is slowly coming back and Dr. G wants blood work done before I have my next appointment. Fasting blood work. Meanie. He’s glad I seemed to have met a really nice man and also finally made my connection with a mental health worker.
Not that the new guy is my mental health worker.
Oh no, now that’s just confusing.
Dr. G is so pleased with my progress these last few months. I do feel so much better with more positive things in my life. These help me handle the negatives going on.
So I hope to get another post in during the next couple of days. See you in my dreams!